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[03 May 2002|09:47am] |
It happened moreover that the child's relations on his mother's side
forgot him too at first. His grandfather was no longer living, his
widow, Mitya's grandmother, had moved to Moscow, and was seriously ill,
while his daughters were married, so that Mitya remained for almost a
whole year in old Grigory's charge and lived with him in the servant's
cottage. But if his father had remembered him (he could not, indeed,
have been altogether unaware of his existence) he would have sent him
back to the cottage, as the child would only have been in the way of
his debaucheries. But a cousin of Mitya's mother, Pyotr Alexandrovitch
Miusov, happened to return from Paris. He lived for many years
afterwards abroad, but was at that time quite a young .man, and
distinguished among the Miusovs as a man of enlightened ideas and of
European culture, who had been in the capitals and abroad. Towards the
end of his life he became a Liberal of the type common in the forties
and fifties. In the course of his career he had come into contact with
many of the most Liberal men of his epoch, both in Russia and abroad.
He had known Proudhon and Bakunin personally, and in his declining
years was very fond of describing the three days of the Paris
Revolution of February, 1848, hinting that he himself had almost taken
part in the fighting on the barricades.
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[26 Feb 2002|10:57am] |
I lay still, strange to say I expected nothing, accepting
without dispute that a dead man had nothing to expect. But
it was damp. I don't know how long a time passed - whether
an hour or several days, or many days. But all at once a drop
of water fell on my closed left eye, making its way through
the coffin lid; it was followed a minute later by a second,
then a minute later by a third - and so on, regularly every
minute.
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[17 Feb 2002|11:34am] |
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Oh, if I had done nothing simply out of laziness! Heavens, how I would have respected myself then
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[16 Feb 2002|02:27pm] |
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Life is pain, life is fear, and man is unhappy. Now all is pain and fear. Now man loves life because he loves pain and fear. That's how they've made it. Life now is given in exchange for pain and fear, and that is the whole deceit. Man now is not yet the right man. There will be a new man, happy and proud. He for whom it will make no difference whether he lives or does not live, he will be the new man. He who overcomes pain and fear will himself be God. And this [current] God will not be
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[15 Feb 2002|01:18pm] |
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I am a ridiculous man. They call me a madman now. That would be a distinct rise in my social position were it not that they still regard me as being as ridiculous as ever.
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[14 Feb 2002|01:31pm] |
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If there is no God, then I am God.
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